Nov. 2 - I'm thankful for the firey reds and oranges of the fall trees. They shine brightly against the dreary, grey days we've been having. And remind me of the beauty in God's creation even when my heart is sad.
Nov. 3 - Thankful for friends and family who have encouraged me after sharing this blog. I still intend to make this blog a documentation of Joshua's medical journey and our emotional journey as our family walks through this together (however you'll only get 75% of my emotions - my wrestlings, deepest struggles and pains are written in my prayer journal)...To me doesn't seem too exciting for the outsider to read but I am definitely appreciative of your kind words since I shared the link.
Nov. 4 - #1 Thankful for a loving friend who gave me a shoulder to cry on and a newborn to hold; helping me hope that one day I'll get to hold Joshua like that. AND #2...thankful for insurance in light of a huge stack of EOB's that we received in the mail that so far have totaled 100's of thousands of dollars. I am thankful for Joe's job that allows us to buy this insurance so that, although we will bleed, we will not be financially devastated by this journey. Thankful that there is no lifetime max for Joshua either!
Nov. 5 - Thankful for friends and family who have lifted prayers for me and our family for the past 12 weeks since my water broke. And for Joshua for the 10 weeks of his life. Thankful for the encouraging words, verses, and prayers written and spoken to me via e-mail, cards, over the phone, and in person. Those words have been such a blessing especially on the days when I need to be pointed back to the Truth.
Nov. 6 - Thankful for all of the people who have offered to watch our older 3 children so we can spend time with Joshua. Thankful my children are flexible and can spend time with loving families they may not know too well. Thankful for grandmas who come and adjust their schedules to help us out. Especially when it means a very last minute change in plans like this week with Joshua's upcoming surgery!
Nov. 7 - Thankful for the 4 children the Lord has blessed us with to get to know here on earth. Thankful for Abby's motherly love for her brothers, her love for Jesus, her amazing memory, her good night notes she leaves when we are at the hospital, her hugs, her caring heart, and understanding that things are hard right now. Thankful for David's imagination, his blossoming faith, that goofy and mischievous look in his squinty eyes, his desire to always pray and be prayed for, his love of music and singing, and his love for his siblings. Thankful for Jeremiah's cute little voice, his dimple, his determination/stubbornness, his love for his brother and sister shown by the way he loves to imitate them, his love for excavators, trucks, trains, footballs, and all things boy, the way he loves to tackle, and for his soft side full of cuddles and kisses. Thankful for all of the little faint sounds that Joshua makes, thankful for kangaroo time, for kisses, for his perfect little hands and feet, for the work God is doing in his body to heal him and help him grow, and for the 10 weeks we’ve had to know this little fighter.
Nov. 8 - Thankful Joshua made it through his 3rd surgery.
Nov. 9 - Thankful I made it through another day in NICU world. Thankful for the Truth and I'm trying to meditate on it...
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. ----2 Cor.12:9
He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
but those who hope in the Lord
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.
----Isaiah 40:29-31
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” ----Matthew 11:28-30
Nov. 10 - Thankful for prayer. That no matter how awkward my prayers feel or how much work it seems I am trusting the Lord hears each prayer lifted. Even when they don't seem to be answered and even when I sound like a broken record to Him, He knows my heart.
Nov. 11 - Thankful for friends and women at church who have reminded me that Joshua is NEVER alone. Even when I feel guilty for skipping a day, not visiting my son...even on days when I wish I could be at the hospital more hours than I already am...or even on days when I'm at the hospital, but not able to hold Joshua - Joshua is NOT abandoned. Even when his nurse is brand new and we are frustrated that there is no familiar face in the room. Jesus is in the room, shining His light on Joshua. God is making His presence known to Joshua, holding my little boy in His all-powerful, yet gentle and loving arms. I will rest in this.
Here's a cute note from a Daddy's friend's mom - written from you:
Dear Mom and Dad, I know you love me lots. I can tell by the way you talk to me and the way you pray for me. When I get really sick, my Heavenly Father puts his arms around me and tells me, "Josh, I am here, and it's going to be OK."
Nov. 12 - Thankful for the piano, for the 9 years of lessons that I took from 3-12th grade, thankful we have a piano in our house now. I'm thankful Joe said he would clean everything up from dinner if I would just sit and play...deal! Thankful for hymns, praise music, Mozart, Chopin, and Rachmaninoff that help me pound out my feelings on the black and white keys. I'm thankful that Abby is showing interest and starting to learn some songs too.
Nov. 13 - Thankful that the call we received at 1:30 am was not a rush-to-the-hospital kind of call.
Nov. 14 - Thankful for meals provided to us these past few months. For gift cards, gas cards, people who have cleaned our house, folded laundry, or mowed our lawn so we can spend more time together as a family without worrying about these things.
Nov. 15 - Well no more planks for a while, but I am thankful to have my hernia surgery over with. Even though I'd never had general anesthesia before and was a little nervous about that, I thankful I have such a brave son. If he can do it, I surely could do it!
Nov. 16 - Thankful for my husband - for how me cares for me and loves me and walks with me through the good times and bad. Thankful for date nights when kids are at Grandma and Grandpa's house too!
Nov. 17 - Thankful for poop! Thankful when body parts and systems are working as they were created to. Our Creator knit us together amazingly complex! If one system is not functioning properly others suffer. I've learned more about anatomy and physiology than I care to know, but in it all I see a creative, powerful and loving God who has given humans the capacity to figure out how these systems work and how to help a baby as sick as Joshua have a chance at life.
Nov. 18 -
Sarah, on behalf of all your friends, thank you for sharing your journey with Joshua. You and Joshua have more prayer warriors than you can name.
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